Living in Reverse and It's Beautiful

Our story of where we are, how we got here, and where we're headed with our homestead journey

My name is Jessica. My wife's name is Karleigh. We have a two year old son who is our world. This is our story.

I grew up in a small town where most people had gardens, cows, chickens, and sometimes a few goats. Most of the older people grew a garden every year and canned their food. People had home cooked meals most nights of the week and kids played outside and got dirty everyday. My mom and dad didn't finish college and though my dad found a decent career anyways, my mom stayed home with me and we made it, but were by no means wealthy. it was always assumed that I would make good grades and go to college. I graduated with honors, got a few scholarships, but it didn't help much because I chose to go to an out-of-state private university. I graduated there with a degree in Secondary Education and Psychology and planned to become a teacher. I also graduated there with $28,000 worth of student loan debt. I landed my first job back home in Mississippi in a town about an hour away from where I grew up. My salary was $23,000. That math ain't math-ing. Twenty eight thousand dollars worth of debt with a $23,000 annual salary. I was already done for. I taught elementary PE, high school psychology, I was the junior high and junior varsity girl's basketball coach, the assistant varsity basketball coach, the assistant softball coach, and the cross country coach. I stayed there three years, then got a head coaching offer making a whopping $45,000 and thought I was set for life. I bought a new car because the head coach can't drive a dented, old Honda Civic. The next year I got an opportunity to move to a much better and larger school and jumped on it with a slight raise. I bought my first home because it was cheaper to own than to rent, right? I ended up eventually being promoted to the head coaching job there and making close to $60,000 a year. I was doing well, so I bought play car- a 1990 manual stick shift Jeep Wrangler. Then, I decided a trip to Europe would be nice. So, I did that and also got a credit card so I could earn flight miles and hotel points. Eventually, I had spent beyond my means and still had 2 car payments, a mortgage, student loan debt, and now, credit card debt.

At this time I was getting tired of working to live and living to work, but I was so stuck in the mindset of 401k(s), state retirement, having a steady and stable salary. There was no way I was giving that up. People who did were immature, ignorant, and doomed for failure. I started to dislike my career more and more. Things were changing. It seemed that no one was being held accountable in education anymore (not parents, student, administrators) except for teachers. We continually made it easier and easier for students to pass, yet the pass rate was decreasing. We didn't expect much from parents anymore. It's not their fault, though. They are just trying to make ends meat. We have to do more, be more. The more we gave, the more people took. The less we expected, the less we got--and much less at that.

It got to a point where I didn't believe in what I was doing anymore.

Then, came Karleigh. We had known each other 10 years prior to reconnecting. When we reconnected, it took us about 3 months before we started seeing one another. She is 5 years my younger, did not finish junior college, had worked as a construction worker, and currently worked as a pool service technician. She paid rent to a friend she was living with at the time, worked out everyday, and hung out with her friends. She'd never been the one to think she'd every have a career because she couldn't seem to finish what she'd ever started. So here I was, a teacher, coach, athletic director with a master's degree dating a pool service technician that didn't finish junior college. And I loved it!

She had always wanted to go to college and get a degree, be stable, have a steady job, have a family, house, etc., but she could never decided on an interest because she had so many. Eventually, she decided on welding, went back to school for 13 months and earned an associates degree. Before she had graduated, she already had a job lined up. We were living together and money was still tight with all of our debts, but she finally had a career. She quickly moved up the ranks and earned raises and even was the lead welder over a small group, but it still wasn't enough, even working 10 and 12 hour days for overtime. After a year, she was already burned out, but she kept going.

She ended up applying for several jobs online as a long shot, hoping to get out of manual labor. A company near my hometown called her for an interview for a welding supervisor position. She's great with reading a room and talking to people and once they met her, it was a done deal. She didn't have all the qualifications, but they hired her anyway. She doubled her income.

At this point, we were so tired of the debt, we decided to make a big move. We sold everything we had and bought a camper to save money. No more rent, no mortgage, only 1 car note and credit card/student loan debt. We tackled it hard. We tore down an old house on my family's land and set up our camper there. We were able to pay off some stuff and save some money.

I guess I should mention at this point we were trying to get pregnant as well. After almost 2 years of trying, it finally happened and

I

lost

my

mind.

I was scared to death about raising a baby in camper. What if we have bad weather, what if the gas tank blows us up, what if I fall walking down this steps. We decided to look for houses. We wanted something with a little land, but small and affordable. We didn't find anything remotely close to what we were looking for until our realtor called us about a house he hadn't even listed yet because it fit our description. Rustic, hand built with reclaimed wood, four acres of land, fencing, sheds, and barns already in place, and it came with a smokehouse and barn. The only problem is, it wasn't small and it was way out of our planned budget. When we saw it, though, we saw our kids playing outside, started a garden, having animals, and living the life we both wanted, We could afford it, but it just wasn't what we had originally planned, but it was perfect. So we jumped in head first.

After our baby came prematurely, I was on maternity leave for 3 months. I went back to work and was miserable. Everything had changed. Karleigh had already been talking about wanting to quit her job and be at home and wanting me to be able to as well. But there was just no way I saw that ever happening. I thought she was crazy- we have to have retirement, steady income, health insurance, etc. especially now that we were having kids.

After another year of this, I was finally sold. In my opinion, the public education system is already dead and decaying. There's no way I'm putting my child in that. It also sets you up for failure, like it did me. Good grades=good scholarships=nice degree=nice job. Then you can be in the rat race until at least 65. Karleigh said it best--- "our lives are determined by a bell or a punch clock from 6-65. Then when we are old, tired, and sick we can begin to do what we actually want to do.

I love being outside and in a garden. When my hands and feet are dirty, I feel present, alive, and refreshed. Otherwise, it's just one more task I must do. We are tired of it. We are getting out someway, somehow. The plan is to do one thing a day to move towards our dream. I plan to be able to quit work in no more than 2 years and when we can pay off our house, Karleigh will come home, too.

Evaluate your life and find something that makes you alive and happy and chase that with all you have.

Follow along for our journey.